WILMINGTON — Howard Cooke Usher, Jr.,born March 28, 1937 and raised in Plainville, CT, was a man whose life was defined by service, strength, and deep love for his family. He passed away peacefully at 88 years old on June 20th, 2025 in Wilmington, NC, leaving behind a legacy that spans generations.
He was a devoted father, grandfather, great-grandfather, Air Force Major, neighbor, friend and husband. He loved and cared for his late wife, Wilberta “Billie” Usher, with tender commitment, supporting her through her illness with grace and quiet strength. His loyalty and selflessness were especially evident in those years.
At home, his greatest pride was his family. He was a loving father to Richard Usher and wife Anne, Julia Murray, Michael Schmidt and wife Toni, Jon Schmidt and wife Sheila, and William Usher and wife Misty. He was a playful and devoted grandfather to Mikol Schmidt, Lauren Prieto and husband David, Sailor Usher, Madison Murray, Matthew Usher, Nathan Schmidt, Will Usher, and Audrey Usher, and a joyful great-grandfather to Daniel Prieto. He was also a beloved brother to his sister, Linda Beeson, and sister-in-laws, Sue Hecht and Janie O’Keefe. He was preceded in death by his wife, Billie Usher, former wife and mother of his children, Sandra Schmidt, and his parents Howard and Clara Usher.
Howard proudly served in the United States Air Force for over two decades. He logged more than 5,000 hours as a navigator aboard KC-97G and KC-135A refueling tankers, traveling across the globe in service to his country. From Vietnam and Thailand to England, the Azores, Guam, and beyond, he served with distinction and pride. He was commissioned as a Second Lieutenant in 1958 and retired with honor in 1979 at the rank of Major. He often spoke with excitement and fondness about the many remarkable places he visited and the people he met along the way. His career reflected his dedication, leadership, and love for adventure.
He loved his family and he cherished every conversation and moment spent with them. He was an amazing grandfather who never shied away from fun; giving “horseback rides”, taking the kids fishing at the dock, afternoons at the beach, and even letting them make a true mess in the back of his truck in the name of a good time. Another love of Howard’s was the water. An avid sailor and water-skier, his love and appreciation for life on the coast was shared amongst his family. He was consistently present, playful, and supportive. Howard also enjoyed learning about his family and ancestry, tracing his roots back to Robert Usher, who came to Cambridge, Massachusetts in 1634. He was also related by marriage to President Calvin Coolidge and descended from Dr. Robert Usher, who served under President George Washington during the Revolutionary War.
Howard led by example. He was hardworking, handy, and helpful, always building something in his workshop or repairing whatever was needed, which was a seamless fit for the impactful work he did with Habitat For Humanity in Wilmington, North Carolina. A natural leader, he also served on the board of the Arjean by the Sound HOA for years and was a steady support to his neighbors. Most importantly, he was kind, always genuinely wanting to help, and full of quiet wisdom. To know him was to feel cared for. He will be missed more than words can express. His light lives on in the lives he touched, in the stories we tell, and in the love that continues to grow through his family.
In lieu of flowers, the family graciously welcomes donations to your veterans charity of choice. A few that come to mind are Semper Fi & America’s Fund, which provides direct support to injured veterans and their families, the Fisher House Foundation, which offers free lodging to military families near VA hospitals during treatment, and Wounded Warriors, which offers a range of programs and services to help veterans with their physical and mental health, career transition, and financial wellness. These organizations honor the values Howard held dear and continue to support those who serve our country.
